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| Brotherly Love |
Brotherly Love
Leia was there to greet the Falcon when it landed. It had been several weeks since Han
had set out on his search and she'd missed him.
Han folded here into his arms as soon as he stepped off his ship. He could tell
from the tension in her body that she'd been terribly worried.
" Relax, sweetheart." He smiled. " Me and Chewie are back in one piece."
" Did you find anything?' She asked, not releasing her embrace.
" Nah, not a peep of Avendor anywhere. He must have been caught in the
explosion that destroyed his base.
I think he's dead all right."
" I hope so." Leia stated. " I hope we don't have to face him again. He almost
destroyed us all."
" Speaking of which." Han started. " How's Luke doing?"
" Not bad. He's been recovering well." She laughed. " He still has a tendency
to fall asleep, which
is driving him crazy. They're going to let him out tomorrow for the first time."
Han was relieved. He'd been the one to find his brother-in-law after the
explosion in Avendor's laboratory.
Remembering the broken and bloody body he'd hauled out of the ruing, Han took a
deep breath.
" Well, that's great. I knew you couldn't keep the kid down long."
' Han, he almost died!" Leia's response was solemn. " If he wasn't a Jedi, he
would have been killed. Two ONe
Bee still isn't sure how he survived his injuries."
" Those metal heads don't know everything. What's important is that he's OK."
Han noticed a hesitation in
Leia's manner. " He is ok, isn't he? You said they were going to let him go. He can walk again and all?"
" Oh, yes." Leia nodded. " He's doing well physically; but there's something
troubling him. He seems, well..
so sad."
" Probably just still tired." Han said, squeezing her shoulder. " You know,
Luke's got to work to overcome his
serious side. Especially since he became a Jedi."
They'd reached the main building of the New Republic headquarters, where Solo
would make a brief report. He
figured if the Council had more questions they vould get in touch with him
later. Much later, he hoped. He could really use some R&R after
chasing leads on Avendoe all over the place.
" You worry about him too much." Han gave Leia another hug. " He's pretty
capable; most of the time anyway."
" You're probabaly right." Leia sighed. " I wish he'd find someone special,
like I did. Someone who would keep
him from being so lonely.
"Hey, he'll get around to it." Han shrugged. " After all, someone special like
me doesn't come along every day,you know.
Besides, I thought he had the hots for Illora. Or is she still acting like he
doesn't exist? Trust Luke to fall for someone who doesn't know he's
in the same galaxy! I thought, maybe, she was mellowing toward him. After all,
she's the one who helped find the moon where Avendor had taken Luke."
" She hasn't been around very much." Leia grimaced. " And Luke's not been fit
for company."
"Well,there's a simple solution." Han was getting tired of the subject. "
Illora should be here later today."
" She's coming back?" Leia asked.
" Yeah. Chewie and me, we ran into her while we were poking around. Said she
was coming here to settle some business." He
pulled Leia into a corner and kissed her. " Let's get done here quickly. I've
got some business I want to attend to."
Later, sufficiently refreshed and reacquainted with his wife, Han headed for
the Falcon To see how Chewbacca was doing.
He figured Chewie had invented a couple of things that needed attention to give
him gime to greet Leia by himself. Now his co-pilot deserved a break too.
The Wookiee was workng onsomething underneaththe ship. He roared a greeting as
he saw Solo approaching.
" Yeah, everything's taken care of, Chewie." Han stated as he stopped beside. "
I reported in like a good little boy. What've you've got there?"
They were deeply engrossed in a very loud discussion of certin modifications
the Wookiee wanted to make when
a slime young woman approached the ship. She stood a short distance away,
smiling at the noisy dispute.
" Hey, Solo." She called. " Do you and the Wook ever talk quietly? The last
time I saw you two, you were
bellowing all over the place, too."
Han looked up, startled, and grinned.
" Good to see you, too, Illora. Just get in?"
" Yep." She started, moving closer to them. " I just got through the
formalities and thought I'd pay a little social call.
Can't do any business until tomorrow, it seems."
The sky was darkening fast, Han noticed. Geez, he'd promised Leiw he'd be right
back. Away for weeks and he'd let himself
get hung up in a technical discussion. Some homecoming husband he was!
Well, she wanted him to come see Luke wiht her; so maybe she him to come see
Luke with her, so maybe she wouldn't be too mad if
he did a little probing of Illora for his brother-in-law.
Looking at the young admiringly, he had to admit that Luke had good taste. Very
striking, with hair fairer than Luke's, and green
eyes, Illora would set any heart beating faster.
Unless you were in love with a certain, dark-haired, dark-eyed Princess, he
corrected hastily.
But even more than her good looks, she was sharp. Years spent as an
intergalactic trader had both her
intelligence and her ability to deal with other beings. Luke thought she might
even have a touch of the Force, since she
could read others so accurately. All except one, that was.
She was pretty indifferent to Luke. Didn't seem to realize how he felt about
her. And, of course, the kid
hadn't gotten anywhere in helping her understand his feelings. Let's see...he
couldn't invite her to dinner, not his first
night back. He liked Luke, but not that much! Maybe he could set up something
for tomorrow.
"How scheduled are you for tomorrow?" He asked casually.
" Why?" Illora squinted at him suspiciously.
" Nothing special." Han shrugged. " Thought maybe you'd come and have a meal
with me and Leia; if you're free.
Nothing real special, but I know she wants to see you again."
"You're up to something, Solo." She accused. " What's going on?"
" I told you, nothing. Leia just mentioned she'd like to see more of you, and I
thought..." Maybe Luke was right.
Illora seemed to be able to read his mind.
" Yesh, OK. That sounds good. I'll see you tomorrow then." She turned to walk
away, then stopped. " How's
Skywalker doing? He OK?"
" I haven't seen him yet, but Leia saya he's made a good recovery. Why do you
ask?" Han inquired.
" Hmmm, no reason, really. Except I picked up a rumor after I met you. It's
possible Avendor survived." She answered.
" WHAT?" Han's response showed his total shock.
" Yeah, bad news, isn't it? It was only a rumor, but someone claimed to have
spotted hims on Eclosia."
Eclosia. That wasn't too far away.
" Thanks, Illora." Han answeredd. " I'll see if we can get more information."
The young woman waved and headed in the direction of the administration
building.
** That was very bad news, Han.** Chewbacca said gravely. ** Avendor is very
evil.**
" I know, Chewie." Han answered thoughtfully. " I'd really hoped Luke had put
an end to him there on that moon. He
still wasn't consciousl when we left, so we never got the full story of what
happened." He paused. " I don't think I'll tell Leia right away. She'd
only worry herself. And speaking of her Royalness; I'd better get home. Do you
want to come, pal?" Han's invitation was sincere,
if half-hearted.
**No, my friend. ** Chewbacca rumbled a chuckle. ** You go and enjoy yourself.
I will go visit Luke. I have
missed that young one.**
" Yeah, me too. See you tomorrow, pal."
Later that evening,after a very intimate dinner with his wife, Han dropped into the hospital to check on Luke. Two One Bee was conducting an examination when Han arrived, so he stepped back to wait. Luke was certainly looking more lively than when he'd seen him last; but he was pale and thinner than ever.
Leia had told him the surgeon droids had operated for hours, fusing bone, repairing internal damage and connecting broken nerve pathways. After that, Luke had spent days in a rejuve tank, and had emerged to undergo intensive therapy to learn to use his damaged body again. Through all of this, it had been his Jedi powers that had kept him going. At the moment of the explosion, he'd used the Force to protect himself and then entered a hibernation state to limit the harm done to his brain and other vital orgas. Despite the massive nature of the damage, he was weeks ahead of any other human in recuperation time. His control of his body through the Force had accomplished that.
As soon as the surgeon-droid rolled away from his bed, Luke spotted his friend.
" Han!" He called. " It's about time you got here. Chewie was in earlier."
" Kid, you look great." Solo hugged the young Jedi. " I think you're after the
sympathy
vote now."
" I feel fine." Luke smiled. " Did Leia tell you they're finally letting me out
for a while
tomorrow?"
" Yeah, and I thought we might celebrate a bit.. Think you'd be up to having a
meal
with us?"
" Sounds fantastic. I wouldn't miss it." He stopped and eyed Solo. " Leia said
you couldn't find any evidence that Avendor survived."
" That's right. Chewie and I didn't turn up anything." Han didn't want to tell
him about
Illora's rumor yet. Not until he had a chance to check it out. " Do you feel up
to telling me about what
happened between you two?"
" Well, I don't remember much before we got to the moon where his base
was. : Luke replied thoughtfully. " I was unconscious when he brought me there."
" Yeah, I know about that." Han reached over and squeezed Luke's arm.
Luke had been stunned while he fought to make sure Leia escaped. With all his attention concentrated on that, Avendor had been able to ambush him and render him helpless. Han remembered Leia's deep grief over having put her brother into his enemy's hands.
Luke grinned and clasped Han's hand. Wordlessly, the acknowledged the depth of
each
other's devotion to the Princess they both loved.
" Avendor underestimated my ability to recover." The Jedi continued. "And I was
able to take him by surprise. We fought; but just when I thought I had him, he
ducked into the laboratory with
his crystal machine. That was the device Avendor had used to create
life-destroying crystals with whick he'd
threatened the galaxy. I think he believed he could use the crystals to destroy
me; but I'd done some tinkering
earlier, using the Force, and deactivated the machine. Anyway, the whole thing
blew up, destroying
the machine nnd the lab."
" And eventually the whole moon." Han told him. " We got you off just in time."
" I've been wondering how you knew where to go." Luke commented gravely. "
Avendor's headquarters
was supposed to be secure from any observation."
" It was a friend of yours who told us where to look." Han grinned. " Illora
showed up just after I reached Leia. Turns out she'd seen a few things and made
one of her off-the-wall
guesses."
As he spoke, Solo noticed Luke's mood changed quickly. I'm right. Han thought. He is in love with her. And why not? He's pretty good looking, if you like short blonds. He thought loyally. And some women actually did prefer nice men, and Luke certainly was nice. Besides, he hadt the Force. The kid ought to have his chance with Illora. After all, he himself had fallen in love with a woman who didn't seem too fond of him at the start; and it turned out fine. Although Han had to admit that Leia had paid much more attention to him in the beginning than Illora did Luke.
Once Solo decided on somethin, he believed in hitting it right away.
" Kid, do you think that Illora's some kind of off-beat Jedi? She certainly
comes up with some spooky things.."
" No. I don't think she's a Jedi. As a matter of fact, I don't think she likes
Jedi very much. She does have some Force potential; but she won't let me test
her or anything."
Han thought Luke looked baffled and frustrated. Women! Seeing that Luke suddenly
appeared tired, Han got up hastily.
" Well, you've got a big day tomorrow, pal. I better let you get some rest."
" Thanks, Han." Luke murmured. He closed his eyes, then opened them and
smiled." You
better be getting back yourself. After all, you don't want to waste a
homecoming night."
" I still think you're totally out of your mind, Han." Leia told her husband as
she
paced up and down their suite. " Suppose Illora takes one look at Luke and
stalks out of here. It'll be worse than
it is now. She's not stupid, you know; and youhaven't exactly been subtle about
this. "
Any minute now , both Illora and Luke were set to walk in and find each other.
She
was furious at her husband for playing games with their guests.
" Relax, sweetheart. It'll be OK. Trust me." Han had to admit he was a bit
nervous
himself. It had seemed like such a good idea, yesterday, to invite both Luke
and Illora to come and share a meal.
Get things going in a relaxed setting. He'd been positive that, once Illora
really got to know Luke, she'd
want to know him better. After all, the kid had a lot of good qualities. He
just needed a little help getting starte.
Now, with Leia pointing out the flaws in his plan, Han was a lot less sure
about the outcome.
Illora arrived first. She and Leia greeted each other warmly.
Whatever Illora may have felt about Luke, it obviously didn't extend to his
sister. Han
decided to start the meal right away. It would be a lot harder for Illora to
leave in the middle of eating.
Han wondered if he could get enough wine into her to mellow her feelings- or at
least
to make her incapable of leaving when Luke arrived.
If Illora noticed that her host was tense and on edge, she gave no sign of it. She and Leia continued to discuss the political situation on one of the Rim Worlds that had recently changed it's government. Although bored to tears by politics, Han realized that Illora knew lmost as much as Leia did. Her sources must be great, he thought. New Republic Intelligence could sure take a few lessons from her.
The door chim sounded. Han jumped at least a meter, then-as Leia glared at him-
went to answer it.
Luke stood there, smiling happily.
" Sorry I'm late, Han." He apologized. " There was some fuss over my leaving the
hospital area. Too One Bee's idea of activity for today and mine differed a
bit." He grinned ruefully. " It also
took me longer to get here than I thought it would."
Han thought his friend did look kind of tired. This whole thing is blowing
up. he thought with exasperation;trying not to let Luke see he was worried.
" Well, you're here now. That's what matters." Han stated as he ushered Luke
in. " C'mon
in and have a seat. We started without you."
As soon as Luke and Illora saw each other, you could feel the tension between them. Leia tried to cover the awkward moment by jumping up and hugging her brother. Damning Han's conniving, she guided Luke to a chair next to herself and away from their other guest.
" Skywalker." Illora acknowledged his presence cooly. " I didnt' expect to see
you."
Solo rushed to fill Luke's cup and get him something to eat. With great effort,
he and
Leia got conversation started again. Luke was fairly quiet and didn't say
much; but it was obvious that he was
listening intently, because when he did comment it was well thought out, even
witty. Han thought Illora ought to be
impressed by Luke's political acumen, but she continued to address as many of
her remarks to Leia as she could without
being completely rude to the two men. This was not working out the way he
planned; not at all.
Han never thought he would be glad to see that gold plated fusspot, but when
Threepio showed up at the door looking for Luke, Han could have kissed him.
" I'm sorry, Master Luke." The droid apologized. " But Two One Bee sent me to
get
you. He thinks it's time you returned."
" No problem, Threepio. I'll be right with you."
As Luke started to get up, Illora turned to him.
' Skywalker, did Solo tell you about that rumor about Avendor that I picked
up?" She asked.
" No." Luke sat back down suddenly. " No, he didn't." He turned his gaze on
Han, obviously
demanding an explanation.
" Well, uh, I didn't want to worry anyone until we'd had a chance to check it
out.
You know how rumors are." Han offered lamely.
As she saw Leia's worried frown, Illora regretted springing her bombshell on
Skywalker. She
liked Leia and was sorry to have upset her.
" Don't worry, Luke,me and Chewie will head out tomorrow to track it down.
There's
probably nothing to it." Han's attempt at nonchalance was not totally
successful.
Leia came forward and hugged her brother again. Through her link with him she
could feel
the weariness both in his mind and body.
" Get some rest " She told him. " You've done too much for the first day."
" I will." He smiled at her. " I don't think Two One Bee will give me any
choice. Once
he's finished scolding me, that is." He kissed her. " Take it easy yourself."
She watched him as he walked down the long corridor towards the lifts. He wasn't
moving very easily. Finally, Threepio said something and moved over to help
support Luke as they continued
the rest of the way. Leia turned to send Han after them, to make sure Luke got
back safely, then realized she was
interrupting a quarrel.
' You just had to drop it on them, didn't you?" Han was saying angrily. " It's
his first
day out of the hospital, and you have to tell him Avendor may be alive."
' Throttle back, Solo. " Illora retorted. " I didn't know you weren't going to
tell them yet. And I certainly wasn't aware that Skywalker's condition was so
delicate! You told
me yourself he had recovered well. And while we're on the subject of tact; you
weren't really the
master of subtlely bringing the two of us together that way."
" I thought..I didn't...Oh, forget it!" Han's reply was a mixture of frustration and guilt. " I'm goin' to find Chewie and go track down your precious rumor." He slammed out of the suite, furious that the automatic door would not allow him to bang it the way he wanted.
" I'm sorry, Leia." Illora smiled apologetically at her hostess. " I didn't
mean to upset you."
" It's ok." The Princess gave her a quick hug. " Han's schemes have the
same effect on me."
She turned serious. " How much credence do you give this rumor?"
" My source is generally reliable, but it's hard to say." Illora shrugged.
"Things got pretty hot
there on that moon; but since your brother survived, it's possible Avendor did
too. He's a very slippery character."
" I know." Leia sighed. " I just wish it was really all over. " Her tone became
more businesslike.
"But wishing doesn't help. For all his faults, Han's good at ferreting out
information. He'll get the truth,
one way or another."
" Guess I'll be going then." Illora glanced at the wall chrono. " There's a
batch of meeting waiting for me."
" I'm glad you came; and I'll keep Han off your back for the rest of your
stay." Leia smiled. " You won't
have to worry about any more awkward encounters, but; please come and see me
again while you're here."
" Thanks, Leia. I will." Illora promised.
As she watched Illora leave, Leia wondered again about Luke's feelings that Illora was touched by the Force. Her friend's intuition was well known, and she often had insights that bordered on precognition. Perhaps that had something to do with her feelings about Luke. It would bear further investigation after this mess with Avendor was over. The Princess took a deep breath and turned to work on the reports that were overflowing her desk.
Illora hesitated after she left Leia. She really didn't have any appointments for awhile; she just wanted a graceful excuse for leaving. She was afraid Leia might ask questions about ow she felt about Luke; and Illora wanted to avoid the issue. She was well aware of his feelings for her,even though he had not declared them openly. I've got time. she thought. Perhaps it would be good to get it over, once and for all; clear the air between us so that he knows where I stand. And avoid any more nonsense from Solo. Her mind made up, she headed for the hospital.
When she arrived, Skywalker was in bed being fussed at by the surgeon-droid.
" All right." Luke said wearily. " It won't happen again, I promise. Now, can I
get out again tomorrow?"
' Yes, sir. Provided you behave yourself. Even you have your limits, and you
will slow down your healing
by overextending yourself." Seeing that his patient was tiring quickly, Two One
Bee continued. " You must rest now. I am going to give
you something to make sure you sleep. Please let the medication work for a
change." He administered a dose with a hypospray
and left his patient alone.
Illora had decided this was not the time to confront Skywalker and turned to
leave. Before she
got back to the door, Luke saw her.
"Illora." He called drowsily. " What are you doing here?"
She saw him make an effort to bring himself alert again.
" Your medic just told you not to do that." She told him. " It's not all that
important. I can come back."
As a matter of fact, she decided, she would rather come back another time. He
was harder to deal with in this
fragile, exhausted condition than he would be when he was healthy.
Two One Bee had heard them and was heading their way. SHe could already hear
the droid's
complaints about his headstrong patient.
" Walk with me tomorrow?" Luke had seen him too. " Please. I have to get out of
here."
Against her deepest instincts she nodded.
" I was just leaving." She inisted as the complaining droid rolled up to Luke's
bed, already brandishing
another hypospray.
" I hate to leave you again so soon." Han told Leia as she walked with him out
to the Falcon. Chewbacca
was already aboard , and had her ready to take off. "But I guess we really have
to know the truth about Avendor."
" It's all right, Han. Avendor has the potential to be a terrible threat ot all
of us. It's better to
have some warning if he's still in operation." She hugged him fiercely, kissing
him. " Just come back soon, and in one piece."
" Hey, it's me!" He responded, returning her kiss. " We'll be back as quickly
as we can. Keep an eye on Luke and Illora for me, ok?"
" Honestly, Han. Don't you ever quit?" There was more affection than annoyance
in Leia's words
and Han knew it. He winked and ran up the gangway, yelling to Chewie.
Leia felt very alone as she watched the Falcon blast off. Suddenly she shivered; feeling something awful was heading their way. 'Enough', she chided herself. 'You're not going to help anything if you start jumping at shadows.' Shaking her head, she returned to her office. Enough work was awaiting her to take her mind off all her problems.
Avendor received the news of the Falcon's departure with great satisfaction. He'd arrived
at the New Republic's headquarters complex a short while ago, and had begun to
put his plans to work.
" Good." He told his spy. " With Solo and the Wookiee gone, that will simplify
things. Skywalker
is still revovering from his injuries and should be less trouble to attack now.
Are you sure you can't reach him
in the hospital? It would be an excellent place for an accident."
" No,sir. That area is well secured and the Jedi is in a special section
because of his
treatment needs." His man informed him.
" Too bad." Avendor replied. " Still, there will be an opportunity; especially
now that he
is allowed to move around again." He paused to consider. " Once he is dead, we
will be able to immobilize the New
Republic command. I had a sufficent supply of my crystals hidden away from my
base, in case of difficulty.
" Couldn't you act now, before you kill Skywalker?" The other asked.
" Probably; but I will take no chances. He got in my way once before." Avendor
stated." I will
not allow him to do it again; and there is an old debt between us that must be
settled. Leave me now! I have work
to do; but let me know anything you learn."
As she had promised, Illora arrived at the hospital the next day to find Luke
up and sitting
in a chair near the window. He smiled as she approached, and got to his feet.
'He looks better.', she thought; but
he seemed worried.
" What's the matter?" She asked. " Have you changed your mind about your
invitation to me?"
" No, of course not. I've just been uneasy. I feel like there's something
wrong, but I can't pin it down." He
shook his head. " No use fretting about it. It'll come when it's ready. I can't
force it."
" Not even with the Force?" She said it more sharply than she had intended.
" No." He said softly. "Especially not with the Force. It doesn't work that
way."
" Why don't we get started?" Illora shrugged. " You were telling me how much
you wanted to get out of here.
They walked in silence for awhile, heading down the corridor away from the
medical area. Illora had
slowed her naturally brisk pace down to a casual stroll to allow LUke to keep
up with her without tiring. He still
walked with a noticeable limp.
She sensed his curiousity as she searched for a way to begin. Probably best to
jump right in before she lost
her nerve.
" After Han's little matchmaking yesterday," She began. "I thought we ought to
talk, Skywalker. I've felt your attraction to me; but I think you should know
that I can't-or rather, I won't- become
involved with a Jedi."
Luke had known something like this was coming when Illora had come to the
hospital the
day before; and she was too direct a person to let things hang, unresolved,
between them. But her thoughts
also contained great sadness, and he wanted to know what it was about him that
was making her so unhappy.
" Please." He said softly." You can't just leave it at that.Can you tell me
why you feel this way?"
She turned her face away for a moment, and when she looked back her eyes
were bright with teard. Luke steered her over to a seat facing the plaza and
waited while she regained
her composure.
" I won't go through it again." She said finally; strong emotion evident in her
voice." I
won't suffer as I saw my mother suffer."
She huddled at the end of the bench, as far away from Luke as she could get. As
if she
could use the physical distance between them to reinforce her rejection.
" Your father was a Jedi?" Luke's voice held both pity and fear. He was
horrified by the possibility that his father had been responsible for the death
of Illora's father
when the Emperor wiped out the Jedi.
" Yes, my father was a Jedi; but he wasn't killed by the Empire. He died in an
accident before I was born." Illora paused for a brief moment. " He probably
would have been murdered along with
the others if he'd lived. As it was, he left my mother pregnant and with my
brother to raise."
" Your brother?" Luke was surprised. " I didn't realize you had one."
" I don't anymore; and that's another reason I will not allow myself to
become involved with you." Illora spoke fiercely, her voice tight with emotion.
" He was older than I, so he
remembered our father. To me, Father was a shadowy figure. His death didn't
affect me as it did Halern.
He had the Force. Oh, not like me; you know there is something of the Force in
me, but it's not very strong.
Not like in you and in Halern. He wanted to become a Jedi, like our father. He
probably would have been
a good one, except that it wasn't a good time to be a Jedi or even have
aspirations of being one. I don't
have to tell you about those times."
She paused for a moment, allowing Luke to reflect on another young man-strong
with the Force- who wanted to be a Jedi like his father. He knew what had
happened to that young
man and his dreams.
" What happened to your brother? Will you tell me?"
" I loved Halern very much." Illora took a deep breath. " He was my
big brother, and I idolized him. I guess he tried to make up for our father's
not being there. Mother
was wrapped up in her sorrow and in the struggle to care for us. We'd gone to
live with some of her
family and the were not entirely kind to us."
In her thoughts, Luke could see a hundred petty insults and slights, painful
and
wounding, accumulating over time; so that walls had to be built. Strong walls
to keep out the hurt.
" Halern would tell me about his dreams.It was our way of escaping our
troubles."
Illora continued. " The problems began when he decided to live his dreams. By
the time he was old enough
to leave home, he was chasing Jedi rumors all over the galaxy. He never stayed
anywhere very long.
There was always another ship to take him someplace a Jedi was rumored to be. A
lot of what I know about
the galaxy I learned tracking his wanderings from place to place. When he came
home it was even worse.
Mother could not understand what drove him. To her, his dreams were ridiculous.
She was a very
practical woman; and with the Empire's New Order , becoming a Jedi became very
impractical. They fought and
Halern came back less and less often." She lowered her head, then shook it." Of
course, he never
found his Jedi; and soon even the rumors stopped. I tried to tell him there
were no more Jedi left in the
galaxy and that he had to find another dream. Somewhere along the way he'd
picked up enough control to do
a few things. Not very much, but remarkable, I guess, when you consider there
was no one to teach him. They
were all gone, the Jedi Masters." She stopped again, looking back at a young
man only she could see.
Luke agreed silently. Halern must have been very stong with the Force to have learned anything on his own. But she was wrong-there had been Jedi Masters left; they were waiting for someone else, not her for her brother. He wondered what would have happened if Halern had come to Tatooine. WOuld Obi-Wan have helped him? It was a fruitless question, and Illora was continuing her story.
" I started working for a trader and got away as soon as I could. Without Halern
there was nothing for me at home; and he almost never visited. We saw each
other a few more times when our paths
crossed. Then, just afer the first Death Star was destroyed, he disappeared.
I've wondered if he was trying
to find you; although you weren't a Jedi yourself then. Maybe he could sense
something, or had an insight
into the future. I never found out what happened to him; but I supposed he'd
died somewhere. It's too
bad he never knew you, that his dreams went unfulfilled."
" That's why I'll never become involved with you." Illora took a deep
breath. " It's too painful to remember Halern and his dreams. I've already had
more than enough sorrow
and pain because of Jedi. I don't want anymore. It's better not to love than to
be vulnerable to
new anguish. I'm sorry if I've hurt you; but you have to understand why there
can be nothing between us."
Luke sat silently for a long moment, trying to absorb what Illora had told him.
He understood why she'd done what she had, even understood why she didn't want
him; but he couldn't accept it.
Then, a horrifying thought struck him. When she'd told him about her father
he'd thought it possible that
his father had killed Illora's. Now it was very likely that Vader might have
been responsible for Halern's death.
It was the same time that the Dark Lord had been bending all his energy to find
him. He, or the Emperor- Palpatine
had been very powerful with the Dark Side- might have detected Halern's
presence through the disruption in the
Force he had undoubtedly caused.
An idealistic youth, strong in the Force without Kenobi or Yoda to
help him; what chance would he have stood against Darth Vader or his Master?
Illora interrupted his thoughts.
" Luke, I know it must be hard; but if you care for me, let it be this way. I
can't
stand any more pain."
" Illora, I don't want to lose you." He shook off his own doubts and horrors
and took
her hand. " There must be a way. Maybe if we could find out what happened to
Halern."
Pulling her hand away, Illora jumped up.
" NO." She said harshly. " There is no way; and finding my brother will not
change that." She turned away. " I've got to go now. I have a business to run."
Illora walked quickly down the corridor leading to the administrative complex.
Luke
started to go after her, but changed his mind. He sat down on another bench and
tried to think. At last, he decided;
for his own sake, if not for Illora's, he had to find out about Halern. If his
father had killed her broughte
he would give up; but if Vader had not been responsible, perhaps he could help
her heal those old wounds.If, by
some miracle, Halern was still alive somewhere not only would Illora be happy
but Luke could help her brother realize
his dreams of becoming a Jedi.
He was still sitting there, wondering how he would go about finding Halern,when
a,
a thoroughly worried Leia and Threepio found him.
" There you are!" Leia's voice indicated how relieved she was. " Luke, do you
realize that Two One Bee has just about sent out a general alarm for you?"
" I'm sorry, Leia." He apologized. " I lost track of the time after Illora
left."
" Illora? Was she with you?"
" Yes, didn't Two One Bee tell you?" Luke asked.
" Well, she's the other one everyone's been looking for. Seems she missed
her appointments and no one can find her anywhere."
" What?" Luke was suddenly very worried; his earlier uneasiness returning
full force. " She left me specifically to make it to her meetings. Is her ship
still here?"
" We checked." Leia answered. " It's still sitting in the docking area. There's
no
indication she was planning a quick departure either. They've got the
hyperdrive disassembled for repairs."
" Something must have happened to her. She was pretty upset when she left me."
He grimaced.
" We were discussing her feelings for me, Leia. I've got to find her."
" What you have to do," His sister said sternly. " Is go back to the hospital
and
behave yourself. Luke, you're in no shape to go chasing after anyone. You look
like you're on the verge of collapse
right now."
Luke admitted to himself that she was right, but the ominous feelings he'd had
before were
still with him. He'd learned not to ignore warnings that came to him through
the Force.
" Please, Leia." He pleaded. " Just let me alone for a little longer. I promise
if I don't find
her in an hour I'll turn myself in to Two One Bee and take my medicine."
" All right." He looked so desperate Leia could not resist. " One hour and
that's all. If
you don't come back then, I'll personally hunt you down and drag you back."
As he got up to leve, she put a hand on his shoulder.
" Be careful, please."
Luke smiled and set off determinedly in the direction he'd seen Illora go. He
didn't have
the time or strength to search, so he had to use a different method to find
her. Concentrating on Illora's presence in the
Force, Luke reached out with his mind. The ominious feelings increased; turned
malicious, hateful. He was rocked by the
intensity. This wasn't Illora he'd reached. Luke had located another, more
powerful, mind. Avendor.
Luke broke the contact and leaned back, shaking.
Avendor was very pleased with the way things were developing. After his spy had reported seeing Skywalker and the woman together in deep discussion, he'd arranged to ambush her. There were enough strangers around the New Republic's administration complex and port facilities for a few more to go unnoticed. He'd identified Illora and knew her reputation as a trader. The rest was easy.
Two men, claiming to want to contract for her services, had sidetracked Illora on her way to her first meeting. Still off-balance from her emotional discusson with Luke, she'd not been as alert as usual and had allowed herself to be drawn away to an office. Once inside, it had been easy to drug and conceal her ina shipping cart for delivery to Avendor's temporary hideout.
And now he waited for Skywalker to appear. He knew his enemy would come, and
when
he did he would kill him. All was prepared.
Avendor looked over at the woman. Still sleeping, that was good. She would be
no problem. Once he'd destroyed the Jedi no one else would be able to oppose
him. He would triumph at last.
Chuckling quietly to himself, he sat back anticipating his final victory.
Luke moved slowly but steadily through the corridors leading to the maintenance section. He knew he had no time to waste; but he had to conserve his strength. It would do Illora no good if he collapsed when he arrived. The sensible thing would have been to have called out the guard and lead them to Avendor; but that would have doomed Illora. His enemy was ruthless, and Luke didn't want to risk anything happening to her. If he'd been completely healthy, he knew he could defeat Avendor; but in his weakened state he was less sure.'A Jedi's strength flows from the Force', he reminded himself, tightening his concentration in preparation for the coming confrontation.
When he opened the door to a small storage room, Luke found Avendor holding
a blaster to Illora's head. She was unconscious and his Jedi senses told him
she'd been drugged.
Avendor gestured for him to enter, a look of deep satisfaction on his face.
" All right, Avendor, you have what you want." Luke told him. " Now let her go."
" No, Jedi, I don't think so." A delighted smile played across the other's
face. " Not yet
anyway. I'm not in any hurry, are you?"
Luke was sure, now, that Avendor was insane. He could feel the Force in him,
but it was
dark and twisted; reflecting the state of his enemy's mind. Only the fact that
Avendor was untrained had saved
them so far. He was no Palpatine, thank the gods. Still, Luke had to proceed
cautiously.
" She is someone special to you, I see." Avendor had been studying Luke
carefully. Apparently
he was talented enought to read the Jedi's emotions. ' I think we will wait for
her to wake up. It's appropriate
for her to see you die."
" That won't do you any good. The others will stop you." Luke tried Jedi voice
control. " You
must give up your plan and let us help you."
" No one will dare oppose me when they know I've destroyed the last Jedi."
Avendor laughed. " I
will succeed where the Emperor and all his forces failed; and all will fear my
power."
His mad resolve apparently made him impervious to Luke's use of the Force.
Skywalker
decided to keep him talking at least until Illora woke up and he could get her
away safely.
" How did you escape the destruction of your base?" Luke asked. " We thought
you'd
been caught in the explosion."
' I wasn't there when it blew up." Again the mad laughter. " As soon as I
evaded you,
I left through the lab's rear entrance and then triggered the explosion by
remote." He pointed at Luke. " You thought
you'd rendered my device useless, and that was why it exploded. Actually, I had
no more use for it or for the
base itself. I was away before your friends arrived to rescue you. You see, you
cannot defeat my genius. Even your
Force cannot withstand me."
Luke suddenly felt Avendor's mind assault his with a blast of mental energy.
Skywalker was
able to turn the attack aside easily. The brute strength was there, but Avendor
lacked the ability to use it
successfully. Frustrated by the failure of his attack, Avendor turned his
weapon on Luke. Illora stirred
and sat up, holding her head.
" I don't know ehat you druzus are after." She said in a dazed whisper." But
you won't
get it this way."
" Illora." Luke spoke her name urgently, trying to get her attention. " You
were drugged,
but you're all right now."
She took the situation in with a glance, her eyes lingering on Avendor with a
puzzled expression; as if she were trying to recall where she'd seen him before.
" This is Avendor." Luke told her, trying to keep his voice light in case she
was frightened. " He
thinks he's going to kill me and rule the galaxy."
' Yes, and I've wasted enough time with you. I've been looking forward to
this for a
long time, Jedi. " Avendor's blaster swung toward Luke and fired, just as
Illora screamed. " Halern! NO! You can't!"
Skywalker dodged the first blast and was preparing to attack when he realized
that
his enemy was no longer concentrating on him. Avendor had turned to Illora.
" What did you call me?" He whispered hoarsely, staring at her.
" Halern. You're my brother." She answered softly. " Don't you remember Illora?"
" Illora?" Dumbfounded by what he was hearing, Luke watched tensely as Avendor's face contorted. "You're Illora?"
" I thought you were dead." She told him. " We all did. What happened to you?"
" I found a Jedi." His face reflecting many conflicting emotions, Avendor tried
to answer. " After all
those years, Illora; I found a Jedi and he taught me...he taught me..." His
face contorted again. " No. It's all
lies. Lies! You won't trick me, Skywalker. I'll destroy you."
Screaming, he fired at Luke, and again Luke dodged the blast. Illora tried
to grab Avendor's arm, but he threw her away from him. The distraction gave
Luke an opening, and he darted to
disarm Avendor. Normally, it would have been easy for him; but he was tired and
slow. Avendor grabbed him and
they both went down; Luke fighting to keep the weapon turned away from himself.
Illora picked herself up and cautiously approached the two combatants as they
struggled on the floor. Suddenly, the blaster went flying away as Luke managed
to break Avendor's grip.
Illora was scrambling for the weapon when the door burst open and two men raced in, weapons drawn. Without hesitation, they stunned both Avendor and Skywalker then grabbed Avendor and raced out again without giving Illora a second look. After they were gone, she realized they were the two men who had drugged her earlier.
She went over to Luke and turned him over, feeling for his pulse. It was strong
and steady, and he didn't seem to be in any danger. The reason for the other's
hasty retreat was
explained as a patrol of guards appeared. The sound of fighting had been
reported, and the guards had
been sent to investigate. They stared in amazement at the torn-up and blasted
room, and at the woman
holding the unconscious Jedi. Illora decided she'd had enough of the passive
role.
" Well, what are you staring at?" She snapped. " Can't you see Skywalker's hurt?
There's probably a metal fusspot searching for him, so get him to the hospital
and let the doc
take care of him."
" Yes, ma'am." The stunned officer responded finally. " But what happened?"
" Can you take me to Princess Leia?" A tired Illora asked. " I'll explain things
to her. You need to search for the three men who escaped. They're extremely
dangerous."
Leia stood beside Luke's bed, torn between relief and exasperation. After Illora had told her the bare facts of what had happened in the maintenance room, she had mobilized the New Republic's security force to search for the three men. So far, nothing had turned up. She also contacted Han on board the Falcon and foud he was already on his way back. He would arrive in a few hours. In the meantime, she hoped one of the patrols would find something.Leia looked up as the door opened.
" He's not awake yet?" Illora asked with some concern. She had not revealed
Avendor's
real identity. She wanted to talk to Skywalker first. Maybe he could help her
understand
what had happened to her brother to turn him into the evil madman she'd seen
today.
" It's all right." Leia assured her. " Two One Bee expects himto wake up
any time now. The complications from his earlier injuries are making the stun
harder to shake off." The
Princess laughed a bit shakily. " He makes me so mad! To go after Avendor
single-handedly in his condition!"
Illora embraced her friend, but before she could formulate words of
comfort Luke stirred and opened his eyes. He looked up at the two worried faces
hovering over him.
" What happened?" He asked in a whisper. He was tired, so tired, but there was
too much to do. He remembered fighting with Avendor- no, he was Halern really,
Illora's brother. Luke had
figured out what had happened to the would-be Jedi. He only hoped it wasn't too
late to undo the
damage. He tried to get up, but Leia pushed him back.
" Just lie there." She told him firmly. " You aren't going anywhere."
" Leia, you don't understand, I must get up. I have to find Avendor." He looked
at
Illora and saw on her face confirmation that she hadn't told Leia the whole
story.
" The security people are taking the place apart." Leia informed him. " They'll
find him. Let them do their job. You don't have to do it all yourself, you
know."
' But I can sense him no matter where, or how, he hides himself. Something
is coming to a head, Leiaa. He's even more dangerous now than he was." Luke
subsided as he realized
he wasn't going to convince his sister. He'd wait. There were other ways around
her.
Leia, however, knew her brother very well.
" Captain?" She beckoned to a security officer standing at the door." Please
see that
there is a guard on my brother at all tims. No one is allowed in here, and he
is not to leave."
" Is that really necessary?" Luke asked softly.
' I think it is. Two One Bee has confined you to bed again for the time being."
She
looked him straight in the eye. " He's concerned about the damage you've
already done to yourself. Please
cooperate, Luke. We want you well again." There were unshed tears in her eyes.
" All right, Leia." Luke nodded. " I'll behave. Have you heard from Han at all?"
' Yes, he should be here any time now." Leia answered. " What he learned on
Eclosia made him turn back immediately. As a matter of fact, I was going to
check as soon as you woke up."
" Why don't you go ahead, then?" He asked. " Illora will keep me company."
Leia left reluctantly, her suspicions aroused; but her feelings were too nebulous to put into words. Short of sitting on Luke, she'd done all she could to restrain his impulsive behavior.
As soon as the door closed behind Leia, Illora turned to him.
" You know what happened to Halern, don't you?" She asked anxiously. " Why he
became like this?"
" I think so." Luke nodded slowly. " We were in contact long enought for me to
gain acces to his mind. WHile he was
talking to you, I did a quick probe. He was captured by the Imperials, Illora.
That's when he disappeared. The
Emperor had plans for him. He thought he could train him to be a rival to me."
He looked at her carefully, judging
her reactions as he went on. " Palpatine wsn't sure what was going to happen
with me, and he saw your brother
as another asset on his side. He took Halern and tried to turn him to the Dark
Side. Unfortunately for
the Emperor and for your btother, Halern wasn't mentally stable. He saw his
glorious dreams of becoming a
Jedi Knight turning to dust at the same time as he was being offered training
in the Force. He couldn't
resist the Emperor; but he couldn't fully accept his teaching either. The
conflict broke his mind. He became
dark and twisted, but useless for the Emperor's purpose since he could not
learn to control the
Force in the state he was in."
Illora was crying quietly. Luke took her hand.
" Do you want to know the rest of it?" He asked softly.
Unable to speak, she nodded . Her beloved brother's fate seemed so horrible.
To think that his dreams had ended like this.
" As long as the Emperor was alive," Luke continued. " He could control Halern,
and
he kept him away from any involvement with the Rebellion. As soon as the
Emperor was destroyed, your brother
escaped. By this time, he hated eveyone and everything. He decided to have his
revenge on the Emperor
and the rest of the galaxy by succeeding where Palpatine had failed. He would
control everything, or
he would destroy it all. And he would outdo the Emperor in one more detail. He
would kill the last Jedi."
" Can you help him?" Illora's grip on his hand tightened. " Can anything help
him?"
" I think so." Luke told her. " Remember, he responded to you when you called
his name and
identified yourself. I believe he can be brought back, at least some of the
way. He'll never be the
brother you remember; but he'll no longer be a danger to himself or anyone
else."
' What do I have to do?" She asked.
" Bring him here to me; or help me get to him."
' No, Luke, it's too dangerous." Illora pulled away. " I won't let
you risk yourself for him. It's not worth it."
" Illora, I'm the only one who can stop him." Luke's voice was urgent. " Leia's
security people won't locate him. They don't understand how cunning he is. They
can't reach him in time. He
has the capability to destroy all life in the galaxy, and he's ready to use it.
The only thing that's
been stopping him is his desire to destroy me first."
Still she hesitated, empathizing with Leia's need to protect her brother.
He caught her thought.
" I'm not just playing games with Leia. If I thought there was a chance her
pwople would succeed, or if the situation was less desperate, I'd stay right
here and sleep. Believe me,
I"d much rather do that." He siged wearily. " Please help me."
" All right." She said finally. " But only on the condition that I go with you."
" Force help me." Luke smiled. " I'm caught between two stubborn women who love
their brothers." Then he turned serious. " You must realize that if I cannot
reach him, I will still have to
to stop him."
"I trust you to do the best you can, Luke." Illora reached for his hand "
That's all
I can depend on."
Deeply moved by her belief in him, he took the hand holding his and kissed
her palm.
" Let's get started then."
" What are we going to do about the guard?" She asked as he eased himself
out of bed.
" That's not a problem." He gestured for her to follow him and they walked
out past the guard, who didn't even notice their departure.
" Handy trick. Think I could learn to do that?" Illora spoke lightly, trying
to keep her thoughts from dwelling on their desperate task.
Luke motioned her to silence.
" I'm keeping people from noticing us." He told her. " It's harder to do if
they
can hear us.."
She saw the look of intense concentration on his face and nodded to show she
understood.
They were heading for a little used section of the complex. When the New
Republic settled here, they had not needed as much space as the Imperial
bureaucracy had; so there
were vacant areas where few people went.
" What are you going to do when we find him?" Illora wanted to know.
' I have to see if I can persuade him to open himself to the influence of the
Force.
He wasn't evil before he met the Emperor; and his attempt to compete with, and
thus overcome Palpatine, than
from true darkness." Luke told Illora." If his old ideals can be reawakened so
he realizes that wht he
is doing gives the Dark Side the victory, I think there's a chance."Luke's
voice sounded strange,Illora
saw that his face was strained and he was pale and sweating.
" Luke, are you alright" She was suddenly convinced that this was the wrong
thing to do. She had to get him back to the med-center before he hurt himself
more. All of a sudden, she became
aware of the irony of the situation. In seeking a way to forget the pain of her
brother's loss, she had
walled herself off from feeling anything for Luke. Now she was caught between
fear for Luke's life, and
her desire to see her brother restored. No matter which course she chose, thee
was pain as well as the
sorrow she had tried so hard to avoid.
He didn't have the strength to spare to answer or comfort her. All his energy was bent toward the coming confrontation. Luke concentrated on thinking of his quarry as Halern, as Illora's brother; trying to shape, with his thoughts, the reality of what he wished to have happen. To give it substance he drew on Illora's memories of her brother; of his ideals and his burning desire to become a Jedi. He focused on Halern's quest for a Jedi to teach him, reinforcing the image with his own feelings of love and respect for Ben and Yoda.
" Stop it!" The cry was loud and echoed through the deserted buildings. Illora
spun around, searching for it's source. Her brother suddenly appeared in a
doorway; his two men
flanking him. All three had their blasters pointed at Luke and herself,
" If you don't stop it, I'll kill you. I'm not that foolishe boy anymore."
Halern/Avendor
stepped closer, the madness in his eyes even more evident now. Illora had no
doubts that she and Luke were near death.
" No." Luke answered quietly. " You are not that boy anymore; but he was not
foolish.
His dreams could have become a reality, and can still be realized. I can help
you reach your goal, and make
those dreams yours once more. Come with me, Halern, and I will teach you."
Illora held her breath, watching her brother. He was struggling hard; someone
or something was fighting within him. The madness seemed to disappear and, for
a moment, she thought she could
see the Halern she'd known. Then his eyes clouded over again.
" No, you cannot make me a Jedi."
" You're right." Luke's voice held great compassion as he responded. " It's too
late
for that; but there are other paths I can show you that will heal you."
" You're trying to trick me!" The madman replied, all trace of Halern was gone,
Avendor was
in control. He gestured to his two men and they went over to sieze Luke and
bring him closer to Avendor. " You can go."
He told Illora. " Tell the others I have the Jedi, and I have my crystals. I'll
contact them with terms for their
surrender."
When she hesitated, Avendor screamed at her.
' GO! Go, before I change my mind and forget you're my sister."
That decided things for Illora. Looking directly into his eyes she told him:
" You have already forgotten. My brother wouldn't do what you're doing now. He
loved
and admired the Jedi. I remember the storied you would tell me about our
father, and the other Knights.
I also remember your sorrow when you knew,at last, that all the Jedi were dead.
Now, look what you're doing.
You've already hurt Luke badly, and now you want to kill him. If you destroy
the last Jedi, my brother, you
will destroy yourself."
Her eyes challenged and implored him to remember, to return to her.
It was almost enough. Halern's eyes cleared and his face became calm. Luke could
finally see the resemblance to Illora. Halern held out his arms and was about
to embrace her when there
was a sudden commotion. Throwing her aside, he called for his men to let go of
Luke and follow him. They raced
back into the empty buildings as a security force , with Han Solo at it's head,
rushed up.
Han took a quick look at Luke, who was being helped out of the way by Illora,
and
gestured to two guards.
" Stay with them." He ordered. " The rest of you, come with me."
As they ran after the fugitives, Luke called out.
" Han, be careful! He's got crystals hidden somewhere in there."
.
Solo acknowledged his warning with a wave of his hand and kept going.
Illora got LUke over to a low wall and eased him down. His face was pale
and drawn with the effort he'd made.
" I'm sorry, Illora. I think you reached him, there, at the end; but there
wasn't enough time." Suddenly he stopped and straightened up, as if listening.
Before she could say anything, the sound of blaster fire reached them. They
looked over
in the direction of the fight just in time to see a bright flash of light. The
sound of the explosion reached
them a few seconds later.
" What do you think happened?" Ilora asked fearfully. She watched as Luke once
more
reached out with the Force.
" The crystals are destroyed." He said wearily. "It was some kind of boobytrap,
I
expect; but before it went off I felt Halern through the Force." He looked at
her in wonder. " It was your
brother I contactedd, not Avendor. Do you see what that means,Illora? You did
succeed. You brought
him back to himself. I think it's likely he destroyed the crystals during that
moment of sanity."
" And my brother?" Her voice could hardly be heard. He took her in his arms,
trying
to give her strength."
" No, Illora. He's gone."
Illora idly stroked her fingers over Luke's bare chest as they lay
closely snugled in each other's arms.
" These past few days have been wonderful, Luke." She told him quietly.
" Yes, it has been wonderful." Luke captured her wandering hands and held them
gently." But you've still decided to leave, haven't you?"
" Yes, I have to go." She told him. " Too much happened to quickly and I have
to get away."
" You mean run away."
She pulled away angrily, then acknowledged that he was right.
" I guess I can't try to fool myself with you around." She said ruefully. " But
I still have to go,Luke. There's so much I have to come to terms with before I
can get on with my life."
" And will there be a place for me in your life-once it's all understood
and organized so you don't have to think about it, or feel the pain anymore?"
He asked. " Or will the
walls be back in place, so you don't have to feel anything, not even love?"
" Who are you to judge what I do?" She snapped, sitting up abruptly and glaring
down at him. " What gives you the right to interfere?"
Luke got up and walked over to the window. Illora studied him, her anger fading.He looks very well. she thought. Complete rest, enforced by Han and Leia, had done the trick.
Capitulating,
at last, to their devotion as well as to his own exhaustion, Luke had done what
was necessary to heal himself
completely.
Before Han and the security force had returned that terrible day, Illora had
asked Luke
to keep Halern's identity a secret.She felt that her brother had truly died all
those years ago; there was
no sense in bringing up the past. So the story was left as the evidence
indicated. Thanks to good
fortune, Avendor's boobytrap had backfired; killing him, his men, and
destroying the crystals once
once and for all.
Han secretly thought Luke might have had a fine Jedi hand in the accident.
Leia, sensing
something deeply amiss with her brother, was not sure what had happened; but
she knew it involved Illora
as well as Avendor.
Illora's thoughts came back to the present as Luke turned back to her.
" Let's get dressed and take a walk. I want to tell you a story."
" This concerns someone I cared for a lot." He began as they walked slowly
through
the airy corridor. " They told me he'd died when I was very young, so I didn't
really remember him. Although I'd
never known him, I was sure I knew what he was like. More than anything else, I
wanted to be worthy
of him. I wanted to be like him."
Startled, Illora realized Luke was speaking about his father. She listened
intently
as he continued.
" Finally, I met him; and I'd been wrong. He wasn't anything like I had
expected.In
fact, I hated him more than any other being in the galaxy. But I still wanted
him, very, very much. It
confused me terribly. I couldn't bear the pain; and I thought about running
away. I could go somewhere
and hide where no one knew me. I believed I could escape the pain that way; and
I was wrong again." He turned
to her and his smile was very sad. " You can't escape. The pain is part of you,
and it shapes you. Sometimes
you can bend and twist your spirit so that you think you've gotten away; but
it's there, and eventually it
catches up with you."
Illora hardly dared to breathe as she waited for what came next.
" There was someone else I cared for who needed help; and that sustained me for
the time.
Until I met him once again. This time I knew I still loved him, and I wanted to
save him. After all, everything
I'd ever done was because of him, in one way or another. He wouldn't listen to
me, or to his own heart-until the end.
Then he returned to his true self. For a moment, at the end, he was truly with
me; and then he
was gone forever. The pain was worse than before. The first time, it had been
only the pain of
loss; however this sorrow was born of both gain and loss."
He cupped her face gently in both his hands, so she would look at him. She
could see tears in his eyes.
" The pain hasn't gotten any less, Illora. I've just discovered that I
haven't lost anything because of it. The understanding I've gained is as deep
as the love I hold
for him. I would not give up the pain, or the love, for anything."
For a moment, she didn't move; then , slowly, one hand came up and traced the
line of his cheek until she touched his tears. Softly then, she began to cry.
Han studied the dancers moving through the great hall. It was a celebration
party; a celebration of many beginnings. He picked out one couple, whose fair
heads gleamed in the lights
hanging from the valuted ceiling. They moved together as if they were one
person, never taking
their eyes away from each other.
" Well, ya gotta admit I did pretty good with those two." Han boasted to Leia
as he indictated the pair of dancers.
His wife laughed, reached over to ruffle his hair.
" Why do you always sound so downport when you say something outrageous? Don't
tell me you're going to take credit for getting Luke and Illora together?"
" Why not?" Han asked. " After all, it was right after my little dinner
that they started to talk."
" Han, you're incorrigible; but I am awfully glad they've found each other.
Do you think there's a chance for a bonding soon?"
" Hey, don't rush things." Her husband eyed her disgustedly. " Does everyone
have to get bonded and settle down, just because you and I did? Maybe Luke and
Illora see things
differently. Besides, is a Jedi even allowed to be bonded?"
" Well, of course he is!" Leia had begun to sputter in outrage that Han would
even think such a thing , when he took her hand and pulled her to her feet.
" Come on." He said, as he whisked her out onto the dance floor. " Let's
go cut in on them, and you can ask Luke all about his love life."
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