| Index | Still Life With A Ghost >> |
| Enemy (Part 2) |
"Luke? Can you hear me? Luke?"
A cool cloth touched his fevered flesh, stroking his cheeks, bringing the return
of sanity. Slowly, he opened his eyes; aware once again of the grass, the sun, the wind in his hair.
' "Luke?"
"I'm fine." He assured his troubled sibling, his voice belying his words."
"Sorry, old buddy, but you're not." Han denied. "You went down like a drunken Saiman in there.
Patting Leia's hand, the blonde man pushed himself into a sitting position, ignoring the throbbing
pain in his head.
"Did I? I don't remember."
"Luke," Leia said softly. "You were delirious. You kept saying you were sorry. You couldn't
move. I've never seen anyone so frightened."
"She's right,pal. You were out of your head."
"Isn't that why you got me up here?" Luke was suddenly,unreasonably angry. " Wasn't this whole day planned to
see how I'd react? Well, you got your answer! Was it worth it?"
Luke leapt to his feet, hand's clenched in fury.
"What's the matter? Don't you like what you found?" He stormed past the shocked
couple, his legs still wobbly beneath him.
Leia moved to catch up to him, but Han grabbed her arm.
"Give him time to cool down."
"Oh, Han. This isn't what I expected."
"Me either, sweetheart. He's in worse shape than we figured."
"Maybe we shouldn't have tricked him." Leia sighed tearfully. " Maybe we just made things worse."
"No." Han disagreed immediately." At least now he can't go on pretending nothing's wrong. He'll have
to face it head on."
"I've got to talk to him."
Pulling free of Solo's grasp, Leia followed her brother's angry footsteps
through the bent grass. Han sighed and followed behind.
Luke had barely found the strength to reach a tree near the remains of their
picnic meal. Gratefully, he slumped against the coarse bark, his anger gone as swiftly as it had come. Pulling his legs up,
he rested hishead on his arms. Confused, feeling abandoned by logic, he sought to calm his frayed nerves.
"I'm sorry, Luke. We both are."
Leia's voice drifted over to him. Squatting beside her brother, she eased her hand
forward to touch his bowed head.
The wide-eyed, bewildered face that lifted at her caress pierced her soul.
" Luke..." Awkwardly, she embraced him.
"Artoo, what's wrong with me?" Luke sighed to his short companion.The series of
beeps and chirps produced by the little being were as sympathetic as it's mechanics allowed.
"I understand." Answered the blonde Jedi. " I really didn't expect you to know."
Staring at the wide tunnel opening, Luke took a deep breath of air.
" It's only in my mind." He told himself aloud.
The three weeks following the disastrous picnic had seen the young Jedi return, daily,
to the scene of his defeat. He would advance ten, then fifteen feet into the perfectly safe tunnel; then turn and run,
gasping in panic, for the freedom of the open meadow. The only witness to his daily attempts had been his stout R2 unit;
brought along as a precaution should he collapse again.
"There's nothing in there, only rock and wind." Luke said. And buried memories. His
mind echoed. " I can do this!"
Artoo beeped confidence.
"I made it through Yoda's tree-cave. I survived the Emperor. I can walk
through this damned tunnel! Fear is a tool of the Dark side, and I will not give in to it!:
One foot before the other, he started forward. Five feet, so far so good. Ten feet,
nees began to wobble, a tremor in the hands. Twelve feet, heart rate increasing. Fifteen feet, can't fill my lungs,
sweating profusely. Eighteen feet...fear! Overwhelming! Walls moving, cracking! Run!
He fell to his hands and knees on the grass of the flowered field; sides heaving. Violently
he retched, vomiting his terror in yellow streams of bile until nothing was left. Shakily, he regained his feet.
"I just need to get away and think." Luke told a worried Leia as she sat watching him pack.
" I shouldn't be gone for too long."
"Did you ever get through the tunnel?" She asked needlessly.
He stopped packing and sat on the bed,facing her.
"No. That's why I have to get away. Maybe somewhere else I can reason this thing out. Leia,
something happened to me in that mine on Ralo; something besides injury to my body. I don't remember what it was, but
whatever it was it's haunting me."
"Maybe you can't remember for a good reason." She offered. "Maybe it'll be too dangerous
for you if you do."
"Maybe, but I have to try. I can't spend the rest of my life avoiding tunnels and close places.
It's getting so bad now that a long, narrow hallway gives me the shakes. That's not how I want to live.
A Jedi confronts his fear and dispels it. Right now, I can't seem to do that."
"Then let me help." She urged. "Let me go to the tunnel with you. Together we can get through it; I knowwe can!"
"No,Leia, listen to me. Whatever's locked in my head is so bad I can't consciously face it. Do you think
I want you there, with our Force-bond, to face it when it does break loose? If it's so bad that I've hidden it,
I certainly don't want you exposed to it. That's why you can't sense me like you used ot. Part of my mind is protecting you too."
" Then let Han walk with you. He isn't Force sensitive. He could get you though. Once you make it
past that first time, maybe the ghosts will just vanish."
"I believe they might, but I have to do this alone. I was alone before, and I have to be alone again
when it happens. Whatever it is. Try to understand. Ultimately, we all face our enemies on our own."
"Are you sure it isn't just pride getting in the way,Luke? You told me yourself that you felt
ashamed the day of our picnic."
"I did, and I do; even when I'm by myself. I've thought about it a lot. It isn't just pride.
I just know that I have to deal with this on my ownn. I can't draw strength or courage from anyone else. Not you. Not Han."
"Why Kashyyyk?" Leia asked. "What's there that can help?"
"I don't know." He answered honestly, snapping the straps on his bag. Setting it down on the floor,
he hugged his apprehensive sister." Something, the Force maybe, tells me it's where I should be just now. Besides, it's
been a long time since I've seen Chewie's family."
"They'll know something's wrong." Leia warned.
"But they'll be too polite to ask about it." Luke smiled. "With none of our
technical hardware, the Wookiees are still far more civilized than ninety percent of the galaxy."
"Don't let Chewbacca hear you say that,pal!"
Han entered the room with his usual swagger.
"He's got a high enough opinion of himself as it is. All set?"
Blinking at Solo, and squeezing Leia's hand, the Jedi nodded.
The trees of Kashyyyk never failed to impress the desert-raised Jedi.
Home to the arboreal Wookiees, they radiated a serenity Skywalker needed desperately. Vibrant with life, warmed by a
strong sense of communal caring, the tree village of Chewbacca's tribe suited the weary mind that sought refuge in it's leafy bowers.
Welcomed in the quiet manner of the Wookiee culture, Luke was soon at home in the human-sized dwelling built long ago by the hospitable tribe. Accustomed to Solo's visits, and later those of Republic dignitaries, the Wookiees had fashioned a smaller version of their own large homes far enough removed from the main trafficways to allow privacy, but close enough to seem inviting. It was perfect for Luke's pressing needs.
Chewbacca had sensed his Jedi friend's need to be alone from the first day of Skywalker's arrival.
After several days, the gentle giant insisted that Luke join his family for the twilight meal. Graciously, Luke agreed; secretly grateful for the
distraction the even would afford him.
Though he had spent long hours in peaceful meditation, the Jedi had come no closer to solving his growing phobia.
The abundant and carefree life of Kashyyyk provided the relaxed atmosphere Luke found refreshing, but the secret buried in his brain
remained stubbornly intact and hidden.
At Chewbacca's home, the Jedi entered a scene reminiscent of a family festival. In truth, it was the natal-day
celebration of Chewbacca's niece who had turned six that day. The proud fathe -Chewie's brother, Ducerak- and mother, were thrilled to have
a Jedi join their festivities. All Wookiees shared a strong reverance for the Force and it's chosen followers.
In addition to Chewbacca, his mate and son, his brother's mate and their daughter, there was Chewie's mother, uncle and
two aunts and a few assorted cousins in attendance. Food was plentiful and delicious. Drink was mild and sweet and gaiety was abundant.Some of
the relatives had brought instruments and soon music filled the treetops.
Though she was only six years of age, Chewie's niece, Tikala, stood only an inch or two shorter than Luke. The Wookiee child attached herself to Skywalker from the moment of the Jedi's appearance, delightedly chattering away to him. Most of what the young Wookiee said was not understood by Luke, however. Though he could follow Chewbacca's general meaning, chiefly because Solo's companion had learned to speak slowly, the Jedi still found most Wookiee language incomprehensible.
At one point during the evening, at the urging of Tikala and Chewbacca's son, Luke found himself in the rols of storyteller. With his host acting as translator, Skywalker told the children of the Ewoks. Although they'd hounded Chewbacca on the subject. the views of a non-Wookiee were eagerly sought. Soon the entire party, young and old alike, was listening-spellbound-to the Jedi's description of the little inhabitants of Endor's moon.
Eventually, the party showed signs of breaking up. The hour was growing very late and
the young cubs were nodding off. Luke bent and kissed Tikala's furry cheek as he said goodnight and the happy girl giggled
and gave him a bone-creaking hug.
To Chewbacca she announced her intention to bond with the blonde Force-user as soon as she came of age. When everyone
laughed she looked confused and hurt. Saying he was very flattered, Luke told Tikala not to worry. The cub, content with his praise,bulged her
eyes with disdain at her elders.
Luke returned to his guest quarters with not a little envy for the unity, the loving support and joy, he felt within
Chewbacca's extended family. Leia and Han were all the family he had left.
Thinking of his sister and her bond-mate, Skywalker again regretted the concern
they were feeling for him. It bothered Luke to be a source of worry to others.
Despite the late hour, he found sleep elusive.
Over the next week, Luke wandered the broad limbs of the Wookiee village; savoring the routines of
the great giants and the myriad other forms of life among the trees.
Flowers the size of his head twined along the strong vines, and birds of incredible beauty and plumage flitted
among the leaves. There was a soul-resting peace to Kashyyyk that settled over the troubled Jedi like a warm comforter.
Yet the nights were not so serene. No matter how restored Luke felt beneath the sun; the dark hours brought the same
choking nightmares back with vivid intensity. Still he was no closer to touching the demons that tormented him. He was
beginning to despair that he would ever feel the control he'd so prized.
During the week following the party at Chewbacca's, Luke had twice come across Tikala. The cub was so happy
to see him that she nearly re-cracked his nearly healed ribs. Playing with her friends, she proudly exhibited the Jedi; delighted the older
cubs with her announcement of Luke as her beloved.
The Jedi genuinely liked Tikala. Her childish pleasures and carefree youth were such a contrast to his own ,often gloomy,
moods that she never failed to make him smile. Her world was filled with love and security, something Luke was happy to see. The black
shadow of the Empire wouldn't darken the young Wookiee's future as it had so many others. He took a small measure of pride in knowing that it was he,
and the other Rebels, who had assured the safety that children like Tikala took for granted.
The sight of Tikala and her friends at play lifted Luke's spirits. When he saw
a smaller cub, scarcely a toddler, clinging to his mother's fur; a cold fist gripped the Jedi's chest and he was
compelled to move again.
The cub bore no resemblance to a human child, but that was what had flashed into Luke's mind.
The image of a small boy, clutching in fear at his mother's skirt.The vision cut at Skywalker like sharp crystals.
It was twilight and the village was settling into the quiet.
From his window in the guest cottage, Luke could smell the aroma of the evening meals and hear the woofs and
growls that called young ones indoors. The breeze was cooler than the day and as stars winked visible through the overhead leaves. A chorus
of insect cries filled the air with a natural music.
Luke nibbled at the fruit in his hand, tired in both body and mind. An interrupted night's sleep
was only a vague memory; a dream he'd nearly forgotten. Hiking the lofty Wookiee trail had rebuilt his
strength; but his quest for answers remained unsatisfied.
Chewing the tangy meat of the oversized pome in his fist. Skywalker let his mind wander among the trees.
Suddenly, he dropped the half-eaten fruit; leaping to his feet with Jedi grace. The Force vibrated around and through him with the keening chords of danger. Someone, someone close to him, was in peril. He closed his eyes, trying to follow the slender thread of terror that rippled through the Force.
Tikala! Tikala was in danger! He ran for the cottage door.
Chewbacca was hurrying along the broad branch toward him. He confronted the Jedi in panting gasps.
"Tikala is missing. Is she with you??"
"No, Chewie, but she's in trouble. I can feel it."
"Where?"
"I'm not sure yet.
Before either of them had reached the main thoroughfare, a shrill Wookiee cry rattled the trees. THe scream
was so full of horror and pain that Luke needed no urging to hasten his steps. Doors flew open as dozens of Wookiees reacted to the stricken
call of their own. Weapons appeared and cubs began to wail.
Luke had no time to stop, no time to tell Chewbacca that whatever the danger was
he felst certain that weapons would not help. Instead, he ran as swiftly as he dared toward the sobs that echoed ahead.
Tikala's mother was rocking back and forth on her heels, occasionally lifting her head to howl
her heartache. Chewbacca's brother, Ducerak, was coming from inside his home; a coil of thick rope thrown over his shoulder.
Seeing his brother,he began to rapidly explain what had happened.
The words were to fast to follow, but Luke felt the fear that Tikala's father was hiding from his mate.
A cub about the same age as Tikala was shivering and sniffling in the arms of a female Luke didn't know. As Chewbacca's brother pointed to him, the cub's sniffles turned to frightened tears.
"What is it,Chewie? Where's Tikala?" Luke asked.
Patting Ducerak's back, Chewbacca let him pass. Four other large males followed Ducerak and the
smaller cub who still wept quietly. The female moved to comfort Tikala's grieving mother.
"Tikala is trapped."Chewie explained. "There is a section of deadwood. The cubs are forbidden to go there, but there was some game they were playing. Someone called Tikala names. She ran away. Farachiwe saw her enter the deadwood. He heard her fall. He is only five. He brought the news to his father. They are with Ducerak now; they will try to free her."
"Can I help?""It is good of you to want to, but the deadwood is dangerous. It should have been cut away long ago. Unfortunately it is entangled with living trees and cannot be so easily disposed of. The limbs are rotten, hollow with disease and insect infestation. Tikala has fallen into one of the lower limbs."
"How will they get her out then? I'm smaller than a Wookiee. I can go where they can't because I'm lighter. She's terrified, Chewie. I could calm her."
Placing a massive paw gently on Luke's arm, the Wookiee stared into the Jedi's blue eyes.
"Han contacted me before your arrival. He told me of the ordeal you have been suffering,Luke. Were it not so, I would not hesitate to ask for your help for my niece. I cannot ask you; the limb would be very much like a cave to you, so large is the deadwood."
Luke felt the chill touch of fear. He brushed it aside with difficulty.
"At least let me see where she is. There may be something I can do."
Chewbacca nodded gratefully. Together they hurried after the others.
Torches flickered and smoked on the narrow path that led into the area the
Wookiees called the deadwood. It was aptly named.
As large around the trunk as a human house, the ancient tree was riddled with living
branches and dull brown wood. The rotted wood spread in all directions; some limbs as thick as Luke's waist, others
wide enough to admit a bantha.
At the Jedi's approach all but two of the several males gathered fell aside; making
room for him to reach Chewbacca's brother and Farachiwe's father. The smaller cub was held back, away from the
dangerous branches.
"Where is she?" Luke askes, peering into the dark shadows of the deadwood.
Ducerak pointed-no translation necessary- to a long branch several feet below them.
Holding his torch as low as possible, he indicated a freshly made hols in the rotten wood of the limb. Turning
to Chewbacca he barked something softly.
"My brother says Farachiwe heard Tikala fall, then he heard her run. She knows the wood
is dangerous. Ducerak heard her crying, but she's made no noise for the last few moments. She does not
answer his call."
Luke closed his eyes and reached out with the Force.
He could 'see' the frightened cub. She was unhurt except for a few scrapess
and some missing patches of fur; but her terror was confusing her reason. The deadwood creaked beneath her,
causing her to crawl deeper and deeper into the hollow branch. Soon she would be wedged in tightly.
"Let me help. Tikala is alive, but she's in a panic. You can't go after her.
Your weight will surely bring down the whole limb, and Tikala with it. It's over a hundred feet to the forest
floor. I'm small enough to go after her. I'm the only one who can. She's too afraid to come back to the hole
her fall caused. If you don't let me go, she'll be trapped."
Chewbacca hesitantly translated Luke's plea as he spoke. Those who were close enough
to hear repeated the Jedi's offer to the others; nodding their heads and growling among themselves. Ducerak
looked unsure. His cub was in danger and he was clearly unable to help her himself; but could he risk another life,,.
one so valued in the galaxy?
Luke sensed the father's dilemma. He took action on his own,removing the
decision from Ducerak's shoulders.
Siezing the rope's end, the Jedi secured it around his waist.
"You can pull us both out if we need help." He told Ducerak through Chewbacca.
Reluctantly, Tikala's father nodded, touching Luke's head lightly in a gesture
of good luck. As Luke moved to look down the hole that was his target, his stomach knotted. Beads of sweat
began to form on his brow.
Observing the suddenly pale face of the Jedi, Chewbacca moved close. In a voice that
carried only to Skywalker's ear, the Wookiee worried aloud.
"Can you do this? It is too much like the mine. I do not like the look I see
in your eyes, my friend."
"There's no one else,Chewie." Luke whispered back. "None of your people are small enough..
Besides, I am a Jedi. I can use the Force to calm Tikala's fear."
"Even if you cannot calm your own?"
"There's no choice." The blonde man repeated. " I have to do this."
Mutely, Chewbacca touched Luke's head then grasped the rope firmly. He motioned to the
others to do the same. With a last nod to Ducerak, the Jedi stepped out onto the deadwood.
There was a soft groan as the rotten matter protested even Luke's light weight, but the limb held.
Studying the branch with a practiced eye, Skywalker saw the missing bits of bark that marked
where Tikala had lost her footing and fallen. Directly beneath that point lay the dark hole her small body
had made in the dead limb below. The tip of a green and living branch protruded skyward alongside the spot
and Luke could see the clawmarks Tikala had scratched there in her desperate attempt to avoid falling. Wrapping the
rope over the tip once, Luke signaled to Chewbacca.
The fortuitous location of the live branch allowed the team of Wookiees to lower the human man down slowly. As he eased off the deadwood, hanging in space a hundred feet above the forest floor by only a rope at his waist, Luke steadied his mounting unease. His face dripped with sweat and he felt his hands slip on the coarse fiber of the rope.
At last, his feet made contact with the wood beside the hole. Allowing the Wookiees to lower
more rope, he coiled it loosely about his forearm; eyeing the insect-eaten wood carefully. It was no small miracle,judging by
the amount of decay he saw, that Tikala had not plummeted straight to her death.
When he was confident that he had enough rope, Luke saluted the silhouettes half-hidden
above him, lit only by the fluttering torchlight.
Sitting on the edge of the jagged opening, Luke felt the wood crumble beneath his hands. Momentarily he
wished for his gloves then, cautiously, he stepped down.
The deadwood shuddered, but accepted his weight. Going to his knees, Luke stared into the total
blackness of the limb.. It's width would give him passage only if he crawled on his hands and knees; even then it would be tight.
The odor of decay stung his nostrils, watering his eyes. He felt the increased beat of his heart in his chest. Wiping the sweat-dampened
hair from his face, Luke gritted his teeth and began moving forward.
The sawdust lining the rotted branch scattered with his movement; blowing at his breath
into his eyes,nose and mouth. The air was stagnant and pungent. The moaning of the wood loud and threatening. Luke's head
throbbed. He could taste the fruit of his last meal rising on the bile of his fear. His throat constricted.
Pausing several feet inside the limb, Luke concentrated on unwinding the rope around his arm.
He tried not to think of how his lungs seemed empty-of the tangible pain behind his eyes, the blackness that had swallowed him
whole. Terror clawed at his mind, promising worse to come with every foot he advanced. Still,he pushed
himself forward.
The horror was overpowering him. He couldn't think. Alien thoughts, mental monsters
assaulted his brain. So alone...yet not alone.
He could almost see the hatred thrown at him, feel it's impact on his senses. He
was a child again, lost and held tightly by tons of sand that longed to envelop him. The grief and terror for her child
choked her mind. The sense of being utterly alone closed over him. He began to tremble uncontrollably.All he
wanted was air, a touch of wind on his face, the fresh scent of freedom of open spaces.
He couldn't breathe. The wood, the stone walls of the mine, the grains of sand were crushing him. The
weight of it squeezing the life from his body. There was nothing of life here. It was all dead. Dead and barren
of hope.
He could use his lightsaber! Yes! Cut through the death, see the stars! Then he
would be alright!
Luke's hand closed over the hard metal handle of the Jedi weapon. A
calmness touched, feather-light, on his arm; moving up to his fevered brain, cooling the madness that threatened him.
He took a slow breath, then another. The pounding in his temples eased. The fire behind his eyes died. Reason returned.
"I am a Jedi!" He told himself sternly." The Force is my ally. No enemy
no nameless fear-real or imagined-is greater than the Force!"
Suddenly, he heard a faint sound; the quiet whimper of a frightened child.
"Not this time." Luke vowed silently. There would be no small corpse, no unjust death
if he had anything to say about it. He felt his confidence return on a bright streak of optimism that surged through his veins.
"Tikala?" He crept nearer the quiet sobs. " Tikala? Jedi." He uttered the only words he
hoped she would recognize over and over. The whimpers softened, through the Force he could feel the cub
hopes return. A sound similar to a gentle purr replaced the fears.
Feeling his way in the blackness, Luke touched the soft fur of the Wookiee child.
There was no space for her to turn toward him, but his soothing Force-enhanced tones kept her from over-reacting
to his touch.
"Jedi, Tikala." Luke repeated. "We'll be out of here soon,honey."
Tugging at the man-sized child, Skywalker managed to het his arms around her waist. He pulled
her to him, backing up slowly. She seemed to understand his efforts-tried to help-but still squealed at every
creak and groan of the deadwood despite his calming presence.
Just as he neared the opening, their combined weight proved too much for the rotten branch. The
limb cracked with deafening finality, plunging from beneath them, sending the pair to hang suspended in mid-air. Only
a few feet of wood held the rope trapped from where Luke had first entered the hollow branch.
Tikala was heavy in his arms, straining the muscles of his shoulders and back. The Wookiees above
could see the dilemma of the child and her rescuer; but even their strength couldn't pull them and the remaining
deadwood snagged on the rope to safety. Worse, the stout cord was rubbing dangerously along the ragged splinters, fraying
the fiber of the pair lifeline.
Shifting her as gently as her weight allowed, Luke turned Tikala to face him.
"Chewie!" He shouted. "Tell her to hang on to me, but not too tight!"
As Chewbacca translated the Jedi's wishes to the cub, Luke found himself tenaciously wrapped by
two circles of strong Wookiee arms and legs, a furry face pressed into his neck. Clasping one arm around Tikala's back, the
Jedi unhooked his lightsaber and carefully sliced the wood away from the rope. With a thump and a flapping
of dislodged leaves, the rest of the branch tumbled away to land beneath them on the distant, unseen, ground.
"Pull us up,Chewie!" Luke roared over the echoing cheers of the Wookiees far above him.
"The message said to meet him at the mountain meadow; that's all I know." Leia
told Han as the Corellian maneuvered the cruiser around the city's traffic. "Didn't Chewie tell you anything?"
"The big fuzzball wouldn't tell me a thing. Just that Luke was on his way back. " Solo grumbled.
" How 'bout that link of yours with Luke? Any change there?"
"If anything, it's worse." Leia shook her head sadly. " It's like there's a shield between us.Nothing
I've tried can get through it."
"Well, we'll be there soon. Hang on."
The land cruiser sped forward rapidly, responding to it's impatient handler. In record time the Corellian
was helping his petite wife out of the vehicle. The meadow was still blooming with colorful splashes
dotting the deep green grass. Overhead, the sky was blue with fluffy pillows of white clouds. The sun was warm,
the breeze was cool. Were it not for their concern, the couple would have welcomed the chance to be in the
idyllic paradise again.
"There's his speeder." Han observed needlessly.
"He didn't bring Artoo." The former Princess eyed it suspiciously. Scanning the field and
rugged mountain cliffs, she saw no sign of her brother. "Do you see him, Han?"
"Not a trace." Solo answered. "You don't suppose he'd try that tunnel alone, do you? Without Artoo?"
"Luke?" Leia's voice echoed over the meadow. "Luke, where are you?" Her pulse quickened. Grabbing her
husband's hand, she began running toward the mammoth tunnel.
Nearing the rounded entrance to the ancient work, Han and Leia slowed. By the same, unspoken agreement, Solo
proceeded ahead of his mate.
Eyeing the shadowy confines of the tunnel, Han half-expected to see his brother-in-law
face down in the dirt. When he saw nothing he returned, shrugging, to Leia.
Over his shoulder, Han heard a familiar voice.
"You were right, you know. The ocean view up here really is spectacular."
"Luke!"
His sister's charging figure collided with the Jedi, nearly knocking the breath from them both.
" Are you alright?"
"I'm better than alright." The Jedi shook his head. "I'm back to normal. I've got control again, Leia.
The nightmares are gone." He smiled broadly at his sister's beaming face.
Sitting on the wide ledge that afforded the senic beauty of the sparkling ocean water, Luke finished the
last of the sandwich he'd been eating. He could feel Leia's eyes studying him, and he smiled.
Seven back and forth trips he'd made through the tunnel had finally convinced her
that his fear was truly banished; but her sibling concern still nibbled at her.
"What happened to you?" han finally asked after watching the silent exchange of meaningful glances
the twins shared. " Can you talk about it now?"
Luke sighed, but there was no sorrow in the expression.
"It's sort of hard to describe to anyone." He began." But I'll try. After the
cave-in on Ralo, the others were still alive. They were injured far worse than I was, but they were alive and
conscious. I could feel them in the Force. I could feel everything they felt; not their injuries so much
as their emotions."
He stared out at the sun reflecting off the green water.
I felt them die." Luke whispered at last. " I've felt others pass on before, but
this was different. It was so still, so dark in the mine. It magnified everything- sound, senses, everything. When
the child-the little boy-died, all I felt was his confusion followed by such emptiness. I think now that it made
me more vulnerable to his mother." He turned to look, earnestly,at his companions." Han, I'm not sure you can
understand all this. As a Jedi, I'm tuned in to the Force more sharply than you can imagine. The Imperial died
first, and just before his life ended his hatred poured through the Force so strongly that it literally
knocked me out. I wasn't prepared for it. It tore into me with a brutality that sent me reeling. When the child
died, it was just as painful because he was so innocent."
"Oh, Luke. The poor woman." Leia empathized.
"Her emotions were so raw." The Jedi nodded. "It was like seeing someone cut themselves
open before you. She was so afraid for her son, so frightened for herself, so angry and hurt. All that she pushed
onto me, and I couldn't stop her. I didn't have the strength, or will, to protect myself."
"But you're okay now?" Han questioned gravely.
"Yes." Luke assured him quickly. " I blocked all the pain I felt in the mine away from me.
I couldn't deal with it and the revived memory of my own childhood trauma the cave-in brought out. You can't
suppress those experiences though; they don't vanish that way. The life forces that attacked me in the mine had to be faced.
I couldn't bear tha thought of undergoing that pain again, and my subconscious took over. It protected me by blanking
my waking memory of those events. They only manifested themselves in remembered nightmares and a claustrophobic terror.
When I went after Tikala, the ghosts of the others were banished by my need to save her.
The Force came to my rescue so I could rescue her. With the ghosts gone, so was the fear. It'll never bother me again."
"I'm so happy you're well." Leia laughed. Sobering suddenly, she faced her brother.
" But, Luke, that doesn't explain why our bond, our connection, is still shadowed."
"That's been deliberate." The Jedi told her, taking her hand. " While I faced those
memoried, I didn't want you affected. The shield between us isn't needed anymore. You'll see that it's gone. There are
some things a person should handle alone; but with the Force as my ally I'm never really alone. I'll never forget that."
"That's great, Luke. " Han said sincerely, then frowned. "Tikala, Tikala...that name
sounds so familiar. Who is she? What rescue? You've got a lot to explain,pal!"
"It's a long story,Han. One I'll save for Chewbacca to tell. He'll be here in one week, by the way. "
Brushing the crumbs from his pants, Luke stood. He took Leia's hand as they moved back into the tunnel
to head home before nightfall.
"At least tell us who Tikala is." Solo persisted."It'll drive us crazy. I know that name!"
"Oh?" Luke smiled mischievously. "Can't have you going crazy just as I've gotten sane. Tikala's this lovely
young girl I met. We're sort of betrothed to each other."
"What?!" Han and Leia's voices echoed as one; but the Jedi was already racing aheadl his laughter
floating back to his astonished family's ears.
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